July 30, 2015

a moment of silence for my blue and white

I can still hear the crash. It's been a little over a week now but it hurts as much as if it just happened. My oldest was grabbing a bowl from the bottom shelf, and for reasons I still haven't gotten a clear explanation for, she grabbed onto the top shelf, putting all her weight on the corner and there by causing the top shelf to come. crashing. down.

Working downstairs when it happened, I heard a big thud, lots of breaking...whatever blue and white is made out of, and a quick "I didn't do it!" And then tears. Her's and mine. The hubs and I both arrived in the kitchen at the same time to see the carnage. All he said was, "Go downstairs. I'll take care of this."


Of course, it should go without saying, no one was hurt and that's what's most important (blah blah blah). But damn, my heart is hurt big time. Not only because I love my blue and white and have worked hard over half my life to collect all this stuff, but also because there were several sentimental pieces that were broken. The foot bath I was going to use in my wedding which I bought on a day that still ranks in my memory as one of the best. As well as the blue and white bowls I ended up going with for my centerpieces. (I couldn't get enough foot baths.) And a small blue and white jar I got at one of my first auctions. Things that cannot be replaced. Ugh, the humanity!

Now many would say 'see, that is why I don't have nice things with children around.' but I see that as a huge copout. I accidentally dropped a pair of scissors on my foot yesterday and took a big chunk out of my toe (true story), but that isn't going to prevent me from keeping scissors in the house. Life happens. I grew up with a house of treasures and antiques and believe me when I say many pieces were broken over the years. But my parents continued to collect and that home helped to develop my sense of beauty and joy. Kids climb things, things break, mommies cry. Life goes on.

Luckily this wasn't my entire b&w collection and now I don't have to feel guilty that I have too many pieces when I buy a new piece. So that's something. And in the grand scheme of life, this isn't a big deal. Upsetting, YES. Life altering, no. But just don't ask me about it, I still might cry.

What's broken at your house? Did you ever reconsider putting things 'out' with little ones around? Do you keep your broken pieces in an old shopping bag in your basement? Just me?

36 comments:

  1. Oh dear. I'm so sorry!! My mom was a big believer of using things she had, even with four kids. The only concession....we always used plastic cups from IU basketball games :). Enjoy rebuilding your beautiful collection!

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  2. Oh Elizabeth, this sucks my friend :( Damn. I feel like it's always the stuff you really love that gets it. I remember walking into the kitchen when Izzy was almost 3. She had taken glittery bright pink lip gloss to the leather handle of my brand new Louis Vuitton. She was so proud of herself for "making it pretty for mommy". I was so upset I could barely move or speak. Things were completely silent until I moved her off the wooden barstool and it fell down, hit my big toe, and I then let out all frustration in the loudest scream/growl/howl that could haven shaken the walls down :D Everyone lived, but it sucked big time. I can still see glitter when I look at my purse handle :/

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  3. Oh Elizabeth! Big hugs to you!!! I'm all for having the beautiful and the breakable with kids--they've broken loads of my stuff but at this point, whatever... You have a great attitude about it; still stinks, though.

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  4. :( Sad day! I have had a house full of dogs, my one daughter and a gazillion of her friends through my house over the years. I've lost some things to breakage and stains and I have to tell you - I was probably equally upset at the time - but I just blogged about her College graduation this weekend- and I can't really remember what things have gone by the wayside over the years but what I am truly missing right now is all the kids through my house. I hate you lost those truly meaningful items but maybe you and your little girl can hit Goodwill or an auction and replace one or two. ( I broke something quite valuable at my mom's house almost 20 years ago when my daughter was a toddler - I did it and not her - and while my mom said it was okay I still think about it and feel awful. Really awful. So I have sympathy for your daughter as well. Go find some blue and white girl - you've got a great eye!! Love your blog and can't wait to see your new collection on display!!!

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  6. Oh so sad. I feel your pain. My husband (not the kids) seems to always be the culprit. He broke a blue and white plate a few months ago but the memory of the sugar bowl still gets me. It was my great-grandmother's and it was always out and full of sugar, being used and took damn near 100 years for my husband to pull something out of the cabinet above and drop it on my sugar bowl. Poor sugar bowl.

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    Replies
    1. Ugh, same here! My husband's nickname is "The Destroyer", he breaks EVERYTHING. I have 2 toddlers who wreck their havoc, but it just seems worse when a grown man is responsible for so much destruction.

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  7. So sad! I have always loved this photo of your collection, and have drooled (just a little!) over your pretty pieces.

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  8. So sad! I have always loved this photo of your collection, and have drooled (just a little!) over your pretty pieces.

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  9. I feel your pain! Things have broken in my house too, and like you, this will NEVER EVER stop me from living with and surrounding myself with things I love because we have kids. My kids have learned to be more careful as they have gotten older, and they understand that when things break their parents might get a little mad -- and then we move on!

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  10. I had a European plate rack filled with brown and white transfer ware platters hanging in a butler's pantry when my girls were small. One rambunctious kindergarten was passing through and knocked it off and it all came crashing down! I cried like a baby!
    xo~Jill

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  11. Well I have never commented twice on any post - I rarely comment at all - but I found a little something today after I read your post and I was thrifting my way home. I think it's meant to be yours. My email is msmillholland@gmail.com Send me your mailing address and it will be headed your way!

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  12. Nothing really major broken but my dog loves to pee on new rugs and I have cried several times/cussed him out!

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  13. I had a beautiful English pine wall rack filled with majolica that I had spent many years collecting. my daughter ( teenager at the time) slammed a door in anger & the whole rack fell off the wall breaking every piece. I was devastated. Got a paper grocery bag & put all the pieces inside to eventually take to a restorer. I still have the bag today filled with those pieces. Maybe it's a reminder '" things" don't matter.. Yes, they were beautiful & costly but no one was hurt as you also mentioned. . Just wanted to say sorry, I've been there!

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  14. So sorry about the loss of your b&w. I just broke my last surviving wine glass from a set I had in my first apartment as a young single. It crashed in bits over my head, into my hair and down my shirt. And the puppy decided he wanted to come see what was going on as shards lay all over the place. Gone are my precious Crate & Barrel wine glasses that saw a life so much different than I live today. I'll make new memories with new wine glasses and lucky for you blue and white can be found new and in vintage shops. On with the Hunt!

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  15. Bummer x 2. When my kids were small I wrote a little poem called The Cup Without A Handle because I had so many broken treasures mostly from my middle son child. I glued and kept everything big enough to glue. I have quite a bit of glued treasure. Time is your friend on this one friend

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  16. Oh dear. I am so sorry . When I was small my Mom "let us dust " the living room. We loved using the lemony pledge and cotton rags. My baby sister , about seven at the time, inadvertently knocked the Tiffany (a replica , but valuable monetarily and sentimentally ) lamp off the side table cracking the shade. I will never forget the dramatic scene in our home that day . Raised to love beautiful things, our hearts hurt as our Mother flung herself on her bed weeping and begging my sister's forgiveness for acting a fool. My baby sister - crying ... face red and mottled, hugging and crying with my Mother feeling worse than I can put into words, carries that day with her until today. We all do. Yes. It was just. a lamp. It probably had a hairline crack in it long before my Mother received it. I know my Mother wishes she had not been so dramatic over a lamp, ya' know "things are just things" -- but she did not have that many valuable items at the time. When I think back, it makes me sad for my Mother and for my sister that event ever happened , but it did, and I wish I could say we all " learned a very valuable lesson from it ". But we didn't ! ( From a family of 5 girls -- now I have 3 daughters). I will still use and display the things I love , and children , teens and even adults will continue to break those things. How we deal and clean that up is what matters. We may not be very good at it and that's okay. Maybe the next generation will be.
    On the flip side. I decided to sell my "good" china after 30 + years. I never use it, don't even like it. I had received quite a bit when I was betrothed and had checked back and forth with Replacements, Inc. to see how valuable it had/had not become and if they were buying my pattern. A few years ago, they made me a nice solid offer -- about half of it's retail value (retail in 1980). Unfortunately, I let the 30 day offer expire. The other day, I reached out again. They got right back to me ( great news I thought). First of all, they weren't even buying the items I had most of, cups and saucers, dinner plates, cream and sugar, platters, etc. . What they were buying, round vegetable bowls ($ 95 retail in the 1980s), fetched around $8 now. Bread and Butter plates about $2. Since my every day Fiestaware costs more than this, it would behoove me to use my "good"china as "everyday" china-- who cares if it gets broken. Right ?!
    Thanks for letting me bend your ear. I appreciate your authenticity in your blog.

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  17. I had a 50 year old vase my aunt had given me which I loved very much - mostly because it had been hers. One day my niece threw a ball in the house - yep - that was the end of the vase. That was 45 years ago - I threw the box holding the pieces of the vase away two months ago.

    Sheila

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  18. Oh, I'm so sorry! A while back our basement flooded and I lost our wedding album in the damage. That one really stung. But glad we live in a digital age where I still have the images on a file. My mother-in-law had a huge shelf in her dining room crash down and she lost about $4,000 in spode dishes. She was totally devastated…and like you said, it's not even about the money, it's about the memories and the time you took finding it all. But happy guilt free hunting from now on!

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  19. Sorry to hear about the accident. I'm glad no one was hurt. I too, refuse to get rid of grown up pieces simply because kids are in the house. When people come over and see I still keep nice pieces around, they think I'm crazy.

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  20. oh no!!!!!!! so so sorry, friend! i have had my own blue and white dishes broken by puppies and kids.... they weren't vintage or anything but still it hurt!

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  21. In my house it was a gorgeous and large flow blue platter that met its demise when the kids were being rambunctious. It now resides as a mosaic design in the birdbath!

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  22. Oh my gosh, this makes me want to cry! I got a whole set of blue and white China from my grandmother when she passed away and I'm irrationally sad whenever a piece breaks (we use it as our regular dishes, so it happens more than I'd like). I've saved some of the larger pieces for some craft ideas and it makes me a little less sad. I'd much rather use them every day than pack them up in bubble wrap and never get to enjoy them

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  23. Oh my gosh...I'm so sorry...when I was little I had a blue willow tea set that my grandmother had given me...My mother slammed my door and the whole shelve it was sitting on came crashing down...I was so sad! As an adult I've been collecting them and have so much..Im going to save them for my grandchildren.

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  24. Awww, sorry for your loss! Maybe if you break something of hers it'll make you feel better (wink wink)

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  25. Noooo!!! I'm so sorry my friend. I can't even imagine how sick you felt seeing your blue and white scattered about your kitchen in pieces, ugh! : (

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  26. OK, that is sad news. I am so sorry.....

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  28. Sorry to hear that...but does it mean you get to go shopping to find new items to put back on the shelf? LOL.

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  29. When she was a toddler, my now-18-year-old dismantled and old handbell that my great-great aunt used while teaching. I couldn't get it back together, so I hid it in a box of important paperwork. (Because that made sense at the time.) A few months ago, I finally figured out how to get it back together. I've got a lot of irreplaceable stuff around the house, but my boys seem to concentrate their efforts on destroying my quilts. At least I can make more of those!

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  30. take the shards and make something artsy from them. I like you, and I am past the age of small children, but always believed in displaying things when my kids were young. We had rules, no one was mean, but they just got it. They appreciated a nice looking home. Ours was on a shoe string budget.

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